Patterns

Sweater: Marc by Marc  Jacobs (a wrap gift from some of my ladies last season.  I didn't buy it so I can't be sure, but it is probably the most expensive thing I own and thus I am constantly nervous about destroying it when I wear it.)

Skirt: Ann Taylor (or maybe J.Crew?  Either way it's thrifted and I'm too lazy to check.)

Shoes: Target

Necklace: Free at a yardsale!  

Not a lot to say about this outfit.  Sometimes Kratz isn't here and I have to take photos of myself in the mirror.  

Bob Mackie

Jacket: Bob Mackie (a thrifted gift from my mother)

Tank: Target

Skirt: American Apparel Outlet 

Shoes: Target

Once every six weeks or so, I'll get a call from my mom that will interrupt me at work.  I answer, assuming someone has died.  It is always because she has gone to the thrift store on half off day and needs to know if I want a fur coat/can wear a size 0/ can wear a size 12/ will wear a pair of shiny high waisted pants.  I always say yes.  Because that's how you get things like this Bob Mackie jacket!

Usually the way my mom describes things over the phone is different than what the garment actually looks like.    When she said "I found a Bob Mackie jacket for $8!" I honestly had no idea what to expect.  Except I thought there would be feathers.  Or sequins.  And that Cher would wear it.  

None of those things apply to this jacket, but when I wore this to work one day my supervisor liked it more than any other outfit I've ever worn, which was maybe the last reaction I expected to get from her.  

Drunk Outfitting

Cardigan: Banana Republic Outlet (gift)

Tank: Banana Republic Outlet (gift, taken to the thrift store since this photo was taken.)

Skirt: American Apparel Outlet

Tights: Hue

Socks: Clarks (lifetime guaranteed!)

Shoes: Clarks (not guaranteed for a lifetime. Or at all.)

*Book: Hilary Duff's Devoted

Sweater: Thrifted (It's mohair or something, and it often gets into my mouth and chokes me.  Totally worth it though, because I feel like Amber from Clueless when I wear it.)

Shirt: Thrifted (It's this brand Foxfire.  I think it's for old ladies and sold at Nordstrom or something.  I haven't done a real study or anything, but I'd guess that 90% of the shirts I pull off a rack to look at in a thrift store end up being this brand.  And I always buy them because they are awesome.)

Skirt: Express

I probably wasn't drunk when I put these outfits together, (but it is possible because I put my outfits together right before I go to bed) but I was drunk when Kratz took these photos of me.  Probably like, pretty drunk, since there are not multiple takes of either of these outfits.  

*In case anyone was curious, this book is not worth reading.  

Medieval Times

Vest: Thrifted

Shirt: Thrifted

Shorts: Thrifted (Forever XXI)

Tights: Hue

Shoes: Clarks

Some of my coworkers still speak of this outfit.  It is certainly not one to be forgotten. and it elicited actual (good-natured, I think) laughter when I wore it.  

It is important to know that both shorts and vest are crushed velvet.  The shorts recently exited my life (back to a thrift store, the place of their sartorial birth) and I will miss them.

Sweater. Dress.

Sweater: Urban Outfitters via Gabriel Bros. (Which means it was like, $3 y'all!  Move to Ohio. I'm serious.  Everything is cheap there.)

Dress: ForeverXXI, thrifted

Tights: Target

Socks:  No clue.  A gift, probably. 

Boots: Bare Traps (Not leather!  They're the best.  If you live in LA and need something cobbled, go to Willie's Shoe Service/Don Ville on La Brea.  They made these look better than new.)

Check this out guys.  I'm wearing a sweater.  Over a dress.  Fooled you, right?  Anyway, this dress is of the super sexy halter variety (where it's more like a weird choker collar at the top than a halter.. what are those called?) and it has enormous armholes so I have yet to find a bra to wear with it.  I am VERY SERIOUS about wearing the correct bra with the correct garment.  You don't want to look like an idiot.  

So this was my work appropriate solution.  Because I felt a need to wear my $4 ForeverXXI thrift store dress to work.  

That being said, I think I'm going to let my  bra hang all out and wear this to a bar tonight.  (It's going to be a bandeau bra guys.  Let's not get too crazy).  

Make it Manly

Blazer: Liz Claiborne Outlet (and proud of it!)

Dress: TJ Maxx/Marshall's

Tights: Gift

Boots: Nine West Outlet 

You know how magazines always tell you to throw on an "oversized blazer" or "motorcycle jacket" to "toughen up your look" or whatever?  I sort of hate that idea, but end up doing it all the time.  Partly to break up a look, but more often than not because a real coat is not needed in Southern California; a blazer or pleather jacket (you think I can afford a leather jacket?!) will suffice.  

People always think this dress is vintage.  It couldn't be further from the truth.  On an unrelated note, I'm especially pleased with these boots because on the way back from a romantic vacay in Santa Barbara, my man actually wanted to stop at an outlet mall.  And stop we did.  He had no idea what he was getting into.  The Ruttinger ladies fucking love an outlet mall. 

Serious Business

Shirt: Goodwill (Vine & Fountain, arguably my 2nd favorite in Los Angeles.)

Sweater: Gap circa 1999/2000 (I've said it before - I think - and I'll say it again:  If someone wants me to part with this cardigan, they will have to pry this off of my cold dead body.)

Pants: Thrifted and gifted by my mother. I think they're Talbots? Or Chicos?  I mean, look at them. 

Shoes: TJMaxx

This outfit is the total opposite of Serious Business.  I mean, are you kidding me?  I don't recall the reaction I got when I wore this to work, (Uh-oh... I just revealed my secret.  I stockpile photos) but I know I did it.  I'm sure strangers gaped at me in shock and not awe, but I think one of my bosses really dug my pants.  

I can't believe I wore this.  This is the result when my man is either out of town or unemployed (and thus still sleeping when I leave in the morning).